Post by xlikeeverysecond on Feb 1, 2009 3:30:31 GMT 1
Continuing on with my story about Melinda, the Chosen One and the supernatural world she's got herself into. I wound up procrastinating it for too long, but I felt the need to write & I wrote it in about 3 days. It'd be helpful to read the first two if you haven't already. Enjoy.
“Sam, really, what the hell are we going to do?” Dean asked Sam firmly. “We cannot just stay here and babysit her, we have our own responsibilites.”
“I think we should stay here and help Melinda.” Sam answered back calmly. “I think we are supposed to protect her.”
“Why would you think that? It’s not like the mighty Castiel told us to.”
“Isn’t it obvious Dean? She was meant to find us; my visions, her….intuition.”
“Okay, maybe you’re right, but I’m not making any promises Sammy.” Dean’s eyes shifted away from Sammy. “What should we do right now?”
“She’s in pretty bad shape, we should probably take her to the hospital.” Sam suggested.
Melinda was lying on the hotel room bed, flat on her back, sprawled out across the entire bed. Her eyes were closed and she looked almost like a very fresh corpse in the manner that her body was laid out to protect the injuries.
“Not necessary.” Castiel’s voice chimed in and he was in the room now, sitting on the bed next to Melinda. He placed a hand on Melinda’s arm and his angelic healing powers washed over her body and began to gradually heal all of her injuries.
When the process was complete, he lifted his hand from her arm and Melinda’s eyes began to open. She saw Castiel before her and then rolled her eyes at him. “I should have known.” Melinda propped herself upright on the bed.
“I do not have time for this Melinda.” Castiel snapped. “I will not be able to revive you everytime something like this happens.”
“Then don’t revive me, just let me die already Castiel.” Melinda retorted with hidden anger. “I’m tired of this.”
Dean shared a glance with Sam after hearing Melinda’s words.
“You know that I cannot. It is your destiny to be The Chosen One and you are vital to this war.” Castiel asserted. “I will intervene if it is a matter of your life, but there will be times when I cannot be of asisstance.”
“So, immortality then?” Melinda whispered to herself, but Castiel could hear even though he did not reply to her rhetorical question.
“Sam? Dean?” Castiel asked, looking at the Winchester boys standing a few feet away.
“Yeah?”They both said simulatneously.
“You are Melinda’s protectors, she was destined to find you. If she so chooses the path of her destiny that the Lord knows she will choose, then she will help you fight the good fight.” Castiel said to them.
“How do you expect us to protect her when we are fighting things beyond supernatural? Superhuman even. We could not even do anything when it came to Alastair.” Dean questioned.
“There are things coming that will be on your level, but your basic line of protection must be prevention, not engagement.” Castiel stated before rising from the bed to stand and face Sam and Dean. “Also, the extent of Melinda’s powers have not reached their full potential. Once they have, the war will start to pick up and Melinda will no longer need your protection but she will still need your aid.”
“Is there any chance that you can tell me what those powers might be?” Melinda asked with curiosity and sarcasm.
“You will discover as the events unfold.” Castiel states formally. “Though I can tell you that you are half-demon and half-angel.”
Melinda was shocked at this revelation. How is this even possible? How can I be a demon and an angel at the same time? Does that mean I’m not even human at all? Is this life I am living just a lie? Please Melinda…wake up. She thought to herself in shock.
“What?!” Dean blurted out in reaction to Castiel’s words.
Dean’s exclamation did not phase Castiel. “There is no time for playing games Melinda, your decision needs to be clear.”
“I haven’t made that clear already?” Melinda said sardonically.
“Not formally and your mind can always change. There will be obstacles, and offers, and temptation to bring you to the other side. You must learn not to give in to the opposing side Melinda.” Castiel said.
“I’m not sure that’s something you learn…I believe that conviction is the word Cas.” She retorted. “Hence my needing to be fixed, and these…beings, wanting me dead, especially my BFFL, Alastair.”
“What’s a BFFL?” Sam asked Dean in his ear.
“Best friend for life, duh.” Dean whispered his answer back to Sammy.
“Either way, there is something that I must show you.” Castiel said. “Please come here.”
“Okay…but no messing with me Cas, you’ve already done more than enough…” Melinda answered coldly before swinging her legs over the end of the bed and standing up.
“You must see what is to come if the angels lose.” Castiel stated before placing his hand on Melinda’s head.
Melinda slipped into a catatonic-looking state, as Castiel kept his hand on her head, placing images of the potential future in her mind. A world where Lucifer walks free and hell is upon earth.
“What the hell did you do her, Castiel?!” Dean blurted out at Melinda’s sight. Castiel did not answer and Dean persisted. “Castiel, what did—?”
“I am showing her a vision of the future…if the angels loose this war.” Castiel replied monotonously.
Finally, Castiel lifted his hand from Melinda’s head. Melinda fell straight to the floor when she came to. Dean and Sam both darted to Melinda’s sides. Melinda was sitting upright against the bed now with Sam and Dean each sitting on either side of her.
“Are you okay?” Sam asked frantically.
Castiel stared down at Melinda and the Winchesters on the floor next to be the bed. “Melinda, the future is up to you.” Castiel said, before disappearing from sight.
A soft chuckle came from Melinda’s lips. “Thanks for that you douche.” She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath.
“How bad is it?” Dean asked subtly.
“You really don’t want to flipping know.” Melinda said before opening her eyes.
“Really? That bad?” Dean commented.
“Oh Deany boy, it was worse than hell on earth. Imagine every evil thing walking free to roam the earth and Lucifer is on the throne. Black skies, torture and pain.” Melinda revealed. “Hell sucked ass, but this…this was beyond anything in the sickest person’s imagination.”
“Deany boy?” Dean repeated in curiosity. “Haven’t heard that one before.”
“What do you mean, ‘hell sucked ass’ Melinda?” Sam asked.
“This was one of the things I had to tell you…” Melinda said, much calmer.
“And that it is…?” Sam said.
“I’ve been through hell…and back…literally.” Melinda admitted, not making eye contact with neither Dean, nor Sam.
“Exactly what I’ve thought. It makes sense now…what Alastair was saying.” Sam concluded.
“Does it?” Melinda said indifferently.
“Why did you die Melinda?” Dean asked in a serious tone.
“Do you know how much it sucks to be in a life that isn’t really yours?” Melinda began. “How horrible it is to see things happen that you cannot stop, day after day? How painful living actually is when you’re not actually human? Well that’s a nice factoid Cas slammed on me.” Melinda’s voice was full of anger now. She continued to keep her eyes away from Sam and Dean and now tears were beginning to build within them. “I killed myself, okay, if you really wanted to know.”
Both Sam and Dean were silent for the moment.
“How old were you?” Sam finally broke the silence with these subtle words.
“Sixteen.” She replied.
“God…I’m sorry.” Sam replied sympathetically.
“Why are you sorry Sam? I killed myself, because I wanted to die. And it worked, for the time, but I’m back and I don’t know why.” Melinda paused for a moment. “And don’t even get me started on God…he’s a flipping bastard.”
“How long were you dead?” Sam asked.
“Twelve days.” Melinda answered.
“And no one noticed?” Sam asked her with curiosity.
“No, my parents were on vacation in Florida for two weeks. They just yelled at me when they got back about not calling them everyday. I wanted to tell them that I couldn’t because I was dead, but that would have been an awkward conversation.” Melinda said.
“Why do you hate God and angels so much?” Dean interjected. “Just curious…” Dean had been holding back this whole conversation because it was a sore subject for himself having been to hell and back as well. Especially considering the events that had occurred in hell, it wasn’t something he was willing to revist with Melinda. He had barely even the guts to tell Sam, but only because Sam was his brother.
“Because He hates me….but now I’m not so sure that’s the case.” Melinda began. “God has ignored me my whole life…and now I know why. Stupid bastard actually had plans for me. And so does good old Lucifer. I bet they’re just dying to have me back in the pitt.”
“I...uh, am actually with ya on that one.” Dean said subtly.
“Really Dean?” Melinda questioned with sarcasm. “I am just so sick of people saying that they understand…they don’t fucking understand. They don’t know what it’s like to lose people, see these horrible things, and be connected to something so much greater but never know what it actually was. Or to have the fate of the world on their shoulders…everything is up to me.” Melinda stood up after saying this to hide the tears she feared would fall; she was trying to be strong at this moment, but it was failing.
“We understand Melinda, and I’m not just saying that.” Sam began to say reassuringly. “We have lost so much and sacrificed so much for pain and toil, but in the end it will be worth it.”
Melinda folded her arms and took a few steps away from the Winchesters. “But you had the choice Sam, you and Dean, I bet you were raised to live the life, but nonetheless you still had a sliver of a choice. I did not have this choice, someone else chose for me. The choice was taken from me. Now look at the only choice I have.”
“End the world…or save it.” Dean stated solemnly.
“Exactly Dean. The decision doesn’t even require a second thought, but if I die that means game over. It’s one thing to make the decision, but how far will I even make it? If I make it…” Melinda continued on.
Sam stood up now quickly and stepped towards Melinda, facing away. “Hey, you’re gonna make it through this. Dean and I will be here to help you.” Sam placed a comforting hand on Melinda’s shoulder. “You’re not alone.”
Melinda chuckled softly. “I get that Sam.” Melinda turned around, and Sam’s hand came off of Melinda’s shoulder. “I am just so tired Sam. I’m sick and I’m tired of this life, 20 years and it’s been more than enough, and now it’s just beginning.”
“Get used to it, I’m pushing thirty.” Dean interjected, still sitting on the floor, now idely playing with a knife from his pocket.
“You hunt demons, but you’ve never been one, have you, Dean?” Melinda toyed.
“Not necessarily….” Dean said.
“Then don’t think you know everything.” Melinda retorted.
“I never said that I did.” Dean replied. “At least I don’t whine about my life.”
Melinda flashed a dirty look at Dean. “Don’t make me kick your ass.”
Dean laughed and then stood up from the floor to face Melinda. “I would really love to see you try, demon.”
“Oh, don’t forget, I’m an angel too.” Melinda snapped back.
Dean took a few steps closer to Melinda.
“Yeah, you’re a real saint sweetie. Especially after hell made you its bitch, huh?” Dean was beginning to overstep his boundaries. “You think you know everything there is to know about pain and life sucking, get real. You were in hell for a couple of short days; try months. Try getting ripped out and tossed back into a life you didn’t want.”
Melinda shook her head in reaction and puffed out air that had the makings of a laugh. Then she glanced at Sam next to her. “He really isn’t that bright, is he?”
“Not at the moment…” Sam said carefully.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Dean asked.
“Way to make a point,” Melinda began before walking toward Dean, deliberately bumping her shoulder into his. “Jerk.” She told him in his ear before walking off and out of the hotel room in the beginnings of daylight.
“What was that?” Dean asked once again.
“Do you even hear yourself?” Sam said.
“Yeah, I do, and I think Melinda’s full of herself and her pain.” Dean said coldly.
“Come on, Dean, she’s just like you.” Sam insisted. “Tired of the life, been to hell and back, but she’s stuck here for whatever earthly purpose.”
“Okay, maybe, she’s been through hell…but I won’t promise to protect her Sammy.” Dean said.
“But Castiel—“ Sam began.
“Said that we have to? We don’t belong here Sam.” Dean persisted.
“We don’t belong anywhere. Besides, we cannot just take her with us, you know that.”
“She’s half-angel and half-demon, Sam. Have you ever heard of something like that? That’s nine kinds of crazy, even for us.” Dean pointed out.
“Seemingly impossible things happen to us everyday Dean, you know that anything is possible.”
“Okay, if it is true, then why help her? We kill demons for Christ’s sake.”
“You haven’t killed me and I’m practically a demon…not your garden variety, but still.” Sam argued. “This is different anyways, she’s still just Melinda. And it is not like she chose the demon side of this fight.”
“Fine, you’re right Sam, but I’m not onboard for babysitting.”
“Dean, she needs us, not just our protection. Do you see how screwed up her life is?” Sam said with conviction. “Especially now. And I think it might even be more screwed up than ours.”
“Our life is not screwed up.” Dean retorted. “Maybe really, really weird, and anything but normal…but not screwed up.”
“Whatever Dean. Like I said, I just think that Melinda needs us on a personal level as well as protection.”
“Touching Sammy, but we’re not guidence counselors.”
“Sometimes I wonder if you even have a heart anymore.” Sam said with disappointment.
“I do so have a heart.” Dean snapped back.
“Do you, Dean? Because I haven’t seen it in a long time, not since…” Sam stopped himself and took his eyes away from Dean and brought them back up to his brother. “Do you remember what you told me on that job in Blackwater Ridge?”
“Wendigo, right?”
“Yes, but do you remember what you told me?” Sam persisted.
“Not remotely.”
“You told me that it was them who would make it all worth it, people like her.”
“She’s not a person, Sam.”
“She’s not? So you look at her, and you tell me that you’re gonna waste her right here. Or you can tell me that you’re willing to walk away right now when she needs us.” Sam said with utter conviction in his voice. He paused for a moment to catch his breath. “What happened to you Dean? Was it what you did? Is it the fact that it doesn’t matter what you do because there’s no way you can atone for what you did? Or is it the fact that you just don’t care anymore because you had fun doing the pain enflicting instead of the saving?”
“Sammy—” Dean began.
“That’s why I wonder if you still have a heart. You told me that this life was all about saving people and helping them and that was what dad wanted us to do. This isn’t the Dean I used to know, what happened to him, man?”
“He went to hell.” Dean answered, barely audible.
“So are you telling me that you don’t care about saving people anymore? They’re all just jobs? And you don’t give a damn what happens to Melinda?” Sam took a step forward so his face was only a few inches from Dean’s now. “Come on Dean, don’t mess with me, because I know you’re attached already. You fight with her so much because she’s just like you, and that scares you doesn’t it? Why don’t you just go tell her that we’re leaving? You can tell her that we won’t bother ourselves with her anymore because that’s what you want. You can just let her do this alone like she has been.”
“No, I’m not.” Dean said firmly. “You’re right Sammy, she needs us…and I think I just might need her too.”
“Then go talk to her, Dean.”
Dean turned away from Sam and began his walk to the door. “She’s a pistol, isn’t she Sammy?”
“Yeah, she’s pretty hot too.” Sam insisted.
“Melinda’s cute.” Dean said subtly.
“Just cute?”
Dean got to the door and before opening it he turned to look at Sam. “Okay, maybe she’s really hot….thanks Sam, for what you said…it really put things in perspective.”
Sam flashed a half-smile at his brother before Dean opened the door and walked out of the hotel room.
The sun was beginning to peak up and through the horizon now over the trees. There was a wide expanse of endless trees in front of the hotel. The Impala was glistening in the morning light, parked in front of their room. Melinda was standing in front of the hotel room window, leaning forward against the railing, staring out into the morning. The glow of the morning was lighting up her face and Dean took a moment to look at Melinda in silence before closing the door behind himself and walking over to the railing. He stopped next to her and leaned against the railing in the same fashion.
“You know, I—” Dean began and then bit his lip, trying to think of the right thing to say. “I had no right to say what I said.”
“It’s no big deal Dean, seriously.” Melinda replied calmly.
“No, it is a big deal. There’s things about me that you do know either.” Dean admitted. “Sammy and I have both had our fair share of deaths, that’s part of the life we lead, dodging the bullet and coming back one more time.”
“You’ve been to hell too…haven’t you?” Ever so slightly, Melinda lifted her eyes to Dean’s and stared into them, almost as if to study them. “I can see it in your eyes Dean, I know what that place does to you. You don’t come back the same person.”
“You’ve got that right…” Dean paused for a moment, he was being cautious about his words because he wasn’t sure that he wanted to tell her everything. Especially the things he had done in hell…he didn’t want to make her thoughts of him impure, but why would that matter anyways because Melinda wasn’t really anyone important in his life? Dean wasn’t sure…why did he have to think twice to make the right impression for himself with this girl? If that was the case, he had already tainted her thoughts. “I—uh, haven’t really talked about this with anyone, just Sammy, but only ‘cause he’s my brother.”
“If you don’t want to talk about it, I understand, and if you don’t want to listen either, that’s fine too.” Melinda’s tried to form a broken smile, but there was no avail.
“No, no, it’s fine. I think you need to hear this…and I think it’s time I talk about it instead of being macho all the time.” Dean insisted.
“Well, I think it’s better to talk about it, even if it’s with someone that is inconsequential, because otherwise it’ll kill you.”
“Who said you were inconsequential?” Dean asked, wondering where the question had even come from himself.
“I did…but I guess I’m just saying that because I’m
inconsequential to you, I’m no Sammy.”
“I’m not so sure that’s true anymore. You’re here with us aren’t you?”
“I am, but why would you care Dean?”
“I do, Melinda…” Dean said sincerely. “I really do. I understand what it is like to be in your position. To feel like you’re—”
“Meant for something more but it’s only led to something less.”
“Yes. And you’re right, hell changed me, I’m not sure I will ever be the same person again.”
“But somehow you will always be Dean?”
“Yeah, but I just wish I could prove that to Sam.” Said Dean.
“Just give it time. In the end, we are who we are, no matter how much we appear to have changed.” Melinda stated with incite.
“I hope that’s true.” Dean admitted.
“It is, and you’re so lucky you’ve got Sam by your side. Someone to actually share this life with. Can you imagine how lonely it would be without him?”
“I can…it hurts to think about. And that’s exactly what I did to Sam, I left him here all alone.” Dean was no longer looking at Melinda and he was now staring out into the morning. “You see, Sam was going to die…and I made a deal with a demon to save my brother’s life. I got one year to live with Sammy before hell got it’s clutches on me.”
“Appearances really are deceiving…at least your death was worth something. You sacrificed yourself for your brother. When I die this last time, I want my death to mean something…and I guess I will get my wish because it will mean everything.”
“It’s really nothing special, I was just being a good older brother.”
“By sacrificing your life for him?” Melinda said.
“To tell you the truth, I was tired of this life and the consequences that come with it.” Dean admitted, he looked back at Melinda again. “I mean, I really do understand Melinda. We’re in the same sinking boat here.”
“I get that now Dean, I appreciate you being so honest with me.”
“Uh…my pleasure.” Dean said awkwardly and paused for a moment. “How did you manage to get out of the pitt anyways?”
“I really have no idea. One moment I was being tortured by Alastair, and the next I was ripped right out.”
“Wait, Alastair himself, torturted you?” Dean sounded a bit shocked since he knew Alastair as the deal-maker and more like one of hell’s managers.
“Yeah, why?”
“Nothing.” Dean shook it off but the question still lingered in his mind. “So, what ripped you out?”
“If I knew I would tell you. But I do have this--” Melinda reached over to her shoulder, closest to Dean and pulled the shirt down over her arm to reveal the horrid, pink scars in the shape of a hand.
Dean looked down at her marks to realize that they were the sames one that he himself had been branded with when he was ripped from the depths of hell.
Melinda released her shirt and let it go back to its original position.
“I have the same marks, it was Castiel who ripped us out.” Dean revealed.
“Are you serious?” Melinda questioned.
“He didn’t tell you?”
“Obviously not, I only met him hours ago. It makes sense though. The dude won’t let me die because I’m too important….special isn’t everything it’s stocked up to be.”
“If you don’t like hell then why would you want to die?...Again?” Dean asked her.
“Isn’t it apparent, Dean? I’m screwed…I’m so screwed that it’s not even funny.”
“Can’t go to heaven because they don’t want you there…” Dean tried to empathsize.
“I’m a suicide case, so I’m predestined for hell…” Melinda added.
“Don’t wanna go to hell because it sucks so bad…” Dean continued on.
“If I die, then the world is fucked…no second chances.”
“And life…well that’s a whole other story.”
Melinda finally gave Dean a genuine smile, realizing that he actually could understand her; he might be the only person on this earth who even could.
Dean returned the smile to Melinda, thinking the same thing that she was.
“Hey, Dean?” Melinda broke the silence.
“Yeah, Melinda?” Dean replied.
“It’s good to know that I’m not alone in this.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll be here.” Dean reluctantly moved his hand over to Melinda’s on the railing and placed it on top of hers.
Melinda looked down at the comforting hand atop of hers then back up to Dean’s eyes.
Dean pulled his hand away questioning his actions. It felt weird to Dean because this was the first girl he had jumped all over because of her looks. Somehow, Dean actually felt compelled to this girl before him because she understood things that no one else could.
“Anyways…you wanna grab Sammy and go for breakfast?” Dean awkwardly asked.
Melinda was not phased by Dean’s sudden changed. She didn’t let it get to her, besides, it didn’t mean anything…did it?
“Sure, Dean.” Melinda turned and walked past Dean to the hotel room door.
Dean smiled brightly to himself, looking out at the morning sun greeting him for a new day. Maybe the end of the world would bring a whole new beginning…
“Sam, really, what the hell are we going to do?” Dean asked Sam firmly. “We cannot just stay here and babysit her, we have our own responsibilites.”
“I think we should stay here and help Melinda.” Sam answered back calmly. “I think we are supposed to protect her.”
“Why would you think that? It’s not like the mighty Castiel told us to.”
“Isn’t it obvious Dean? She was meant to find us; my visions, her….intuition.”
“Okay, maybe you’re right, but I’m not making any promises Sammy.” Dean’s eyes shifted away from Sammy. “What should we do right now?”
“She’s in pretty bad shape, we should probably take her to the hospital.” Sam suggested.
Melinda was lying on the hotel room bed, flat on her back, sprawled out across the entire bed. Her eyes were closed and she looked almost like a very fresh corpse in the manner that her body was laid out to protect the injuries.
“Not necessary.” Castiel’s voice chimed in and he was in the room now, sitting on the bed next to Melinda. He placed a hand on Melinda’s arm and his angelic healing powers washed over her body and began to gradually heal all of her injuries.
When the process was complete, he lifted his hand from her arm and Melinda’s eyes began to open. She saw Castiel before her and then rolled her eyes at him. “I should have known.” Melinda propped herself upright on the bed.
“I do not have time for this Melinda.” Castiel snapped. “I will not be able to revive you everytime something like this happens.”
“Then don’t revive me, just let me die already Castiel.” Melinda retorted with hidden anger. “I’m tired of this.”
Dean shared a glance with Sam after hearing Melinda’s words.
“You know that I cannot. It is your destiny to be The Chosen One and you are vital to this war.” Castiel asserted. “I will intervene if it is a matter of your life, but there will be times when I cannot be of asisstance.”
“So, immortality then?” Melinda whispered to herself, but Castiel could hear even though he did not reply to her rhetorical question.
“Sam? Dean?” Castiel asked, looking at the Winchester boys standing a few feet away.
“Yeah?”They both said simulatneously.
“You are Melinda’s protectors, she was destined to find you. If she so chooses the path of her destiny that the Lord knows she will choose, then she will help you fight the good fight.” Castiel said to them.
“How do you expect us to protect her when we are fighting things beyond supernatural? Superhuman even. We could not even do anything when it came to Alastair.” Dean questioned.
“There are things coming that will be on your level, but your basic line of protection must be prevention, not engagement.” Castiel stated before rising from the bed to stand and face Sam and Dean. “Also, the extent of Melinda’s powers have not reached their full potential. Once they have, the war will start to pick up and Melinda will no longer need your protection but she will still need your aid.”
“Is there any chance that you can tell me what those powers might be?” Melinda asked with curiosity and sarcasm.
“You will discover as the events unfold.” Castiel states formally. “Though I can tell you that you are half-demon and half-angel.”
Melinda was shocked at this revelation. How is this even possible? How can I be a demon and an angel at the same time? Does that mean I’m not even human at all? Is this life I am living just a lie? Please Melinda…wake up. She thought to herself in shock.
“What?!” Dean blurted out in reaction to Castiel’s words.
Dean’s exclamation did not phase Castiel. “There is no time for playing games Melinda, your decision needs to be clear.”
“I haven’t made that clear already?” Melinda said sardonically.
“Not formally and your mind can always change. There will be obstacles, and offers, and temptation to bring you to the other side. You must learn not to give in to the opposing side Melinda.” Castiel said.
“I’m not sure that’s something you learn…I believe that conviction is the word Cas.” She retorted. “Hence my needing to be fixed, and these…beings, wanting me dead, especially my BFFL, Alastair.”
“What’s a BFFL?” Sam asked Dean in his ear.
“Best friend for life, duh.” Dean whispered his answer back to Sammy.
“Either way, there is something that I must show you.” Castiel said. “Please come here.”
“Okay…but no messing with me Cas, you’ve already done more than enough…” Melinda answered coldly before swinging her legs over the end of the bed and standing up.
“You must see what is to come if the angels lose.” Castiel stated before placing his hand on Melinda’s head.
Melinda slipped into a catatonic-looking state, as Castiel kept his hand on her head, placing images of the potential future in her mind. A world where Lucifer walks free and hell is upon earth.
“What the hell did you do her, Castiel?!” Dean blurted out at Melinda’s sight. Castiel did not answer and Dean persisted. “Castiel, what did—?”
“I am showing her a vision of the future…if the angels loose this war.” Castiel replied monotonously.
Finally, Castiel lifted his hand from Melinda’s head. Melinda fell straight to the floor when she came to. Dean and Sam both darted to Melinda’s sides. Melinda was sitting upright against the bed now with Sam and Dean each sitting on either side of her.
“Are you okay?” Sam asked frantically.
Castiel stared down at Melinda and the Winchesters on the floor next to be the bed. “Melinda, the future is up to you.” Castiel said, before disappearing from sight.
A soft chuckle came from Melinda’s lips. “Thanks for that you douche.” She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath.
“How bad is it?” Dean asked subtly.
“You really don’t want to flipping know.” Melinda said before opening her eyes.
“Really? That bad?” Dean commented.
“Oh Deany boy, it was worse than hell on earth. Imagine every evil thing walking free to roam the earth and Lucifer is on the throne. Black skies, torture and pain.” Melinda revealed. “Hell sucked ass, but this…this was beyond anything in the sickest person’s imagination.”
“Deany boy?” Dean repeated in curiosity. “Haven’t heard that one before.”
“What do you mean, ‘hell sucked ass’ Melinda?” Sam asked.
“This was one of the things I had to tell you…” Melinda said, much calmer.
“And that it is…?” Sam said.
“I’ve been through hell…and back…literally.” Melinda admitted, not making eye contact with neither Dean, nor Sam.
“Exactly what I’ve thought. It makes sense now…what Alastair was saying.” Sam concluded.
“Does it?” Melinda said indifferently.
“Why did you die Melinda?” Dean asked in a serious tone.
“Do you know how much it sucks to be in a life that isn’t really yours?” Melinda began. “How horrible it is to see things happen that you cannot stop, day after day? How painful living actually is when you’re not actually human? Well that’s a nice factoid Cas slammed on me.” Melinda’s voice was full of anger now. She continued to keep her eyes away from Sam and Dean and now tears were beginning to build within them. “I killed myself, okay, if you really wanted to know.”
Both Sam and Dean were silent for the moment.
“How old were you?” Sam finally broke the silence with these subtle words.
“Sixteen.” She replied.
“God…I’m sorry.” Sam replied sympathetically.
“Why are you sorry Sam? I killed myself, because I wanted to die. And it worked, for the time, but I’m back and I don’t know why.” Melinda paused for a moment. “And don’t even get me started on God…he’s a flipping bastard.”
“How long were you dead?” Sam asked.
“Twelve days.” Melinda answered.
“And no one noticed?” Sam asked her with curiosity.
“No, my parents were on vacation in Florida for two weeks. They just yelled at me when they got back about not calling them everyday. I wanted to tell them that I couldn’t because I was dead, but that would have been an awkward conversation.” Melinda said.
“Why do you hate God and angels so much?” Dean interjected. “Just curious…” Dean had been holding back this whole conversation because it was a sore subject for himself having been to hell and back as well. Especially considering the events that had occurred in hell, it wasn’t something he was willing to revist with Melinda. He had barely even the guts to tell Sam, but only because Sam was his brother.
“Because He hates me….but now I’m not so sure that’s the case.” Melinda began. “God has ignored me my whole life…and now I know why. Stupid bastard actually had plans for me. And so does good old Lucifer. I bet they’re just dying to have me back in the pitt.”
“I...uh, am actually with ya on that one.” Dean said subtly.
“Really Dean?” Melinda questioned with sarcasm. “I am just so sick of people saying that they understand…they don’t fucking understand. They don’t know what it’s like to lose people, see these horrible things, and be connected to something so much greater but never know what it actually was. Or to have the fate of the world on their shoulders…everything is up to me.” Melinda stood up after saying this to hide the tears she feared would fall; she was trying to be strong at this moment, but it was failing.
“We understand Melinda, and I’m not just saying that.” Sam began to say reassuringly. “We have lost so much and sacrificed so much for pain and toil, but in the end it will be worth it.”
Melinda folded her arms and took a few steps away from the Winchesters. “But you had the choice Sam, you and Dean, I bet you were raised to live the life, but nonetheless you still had a sliver of a choice. I did not have this choice, someone else chose for me. The choice was taken from me. Now look at the only choice I have.”
“End the world…or save it.” Dean stated solemnly.
“Exactly Dean. The decision doesn’t even require a second thought, but if I die that means game over. It’s one thing to make the decision, but how far will I even make it? If I make it…” Melinda continued on.
Sam stood up now quickly and stepped towards Melinda, facing away. “Hey, you’re gonna make it through this. Dean and I will be here to help you.” Sam placed a comforting hand on Melinda’s shoulder. “You’re not alone.”
Melinda chuckled softly. “I get that Sam.” Melinda turned around, and Sam’s hand came off of Melinda’s shoulder. “I am just so tired Sam. I’m sick and I’m tired of this life, 20 years and it’s been more than enough, and now it’s just beginning.”
“Get used to it, I’m pushing thirty.” Dean interjected, still sitting on the floor, now idely playing with a knife from his pocket.
“You hunt demons, but you’ve never been one, have you, Dean?” Melinda toyed.
“Not necessarily….” Dean said.
“Then don’t think you know everything.” Melinda retorted.
“I never said that I did.” Dean replied. “At least I don’t whine about my life.”
Melinda flashed a dirty look at Dean. “Don’t make me kick your ass.”
Dean laughed and then stood up from the floor to face Melinda. “I would really love to see you try, demon.”
“Oh, don’t forget, I’m an angel too.” Melinda snapped back.
Dean took a few steps closer to Melinda.
“Yeah, you’re a real saint sweetie. Especially after hell made you its bitch, huh?” Dean was beginning to overstep his boundaries. “You think you know everything there is to know about pain and life sucking, get real. You were in hell for a couple of short days; try months. Try getting ripped out and tossed back into a life you didn’t want.”
Melinda shook her head in reaction and puffed out air that had the makings of a laugh. Then she glanced at Sam next to her. “He really isn’t that bright, is he?”
“Not at the moment…” Sam said carefully.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Dean asked.
“Way to make a point,” Melinda began before walking toward Dean, deliberately bumping her shoulder into his. “Jerk.” She told him in his ear before walking off and out of the hotel room in the beginnings of daylight.
“What was that?” Dean asked once again.
“Do you even hear yourself?” Sam said.
“Yeah, I do, and I think Melinda’s full of herself and her pain.” Dean said coldly.
“Come on, Dean, she’s just like you.” Sam insisted. “Tired of the life, been to hell and back, but she’s stuck here for whatever earthly purpose.”
“Okay, maybe, she’s been through hell…but I won’t promise to protect her Sammy.” Dean said.
“But Castiel—“ Sam began.
“Said that we have to? We don’t belong here Sam.” Dean persisted.
“We don’t belong anywhere. Besides, we cannot just take her with us, you know that.”
“She’s half-angel and half-demon, Sam. Have you ever heard of something like that? That’s nine kinds of crazy, even for us.” Dean pointed out.
“Seemingly impossible things happen to us everyday Dean, you know that anything is possible.”
“Okay, if it is true, then why help her? We kill demons for Christ’s sake.”
“You haven’t killed me and I’m practically a demon…not your garden variety, but still.” Sam argued. “This is different anyways, she’s still just Melinda. And it is not like she chose the demon side of this fight.”
“Fine, you’re right Sam, but I’m not onboard for babysitting.”
“Dean, she needs us, not just our protection. Do you see how screwed up her life is?” Sam said with conviction. “Especially now. And I think it might even be more screwed up than ours.”
“Our life is not screwed up.” Dean retorted. “Maybe really, really weird, and anything but normal…but not screwed up.”
“Whatever Dean. Like I said, I just think that Melinda needs us on a personal level as well as protection.”
“Touching Sammy, but we’re not guidence counselors.”
“Sometimes I wonder if you even have a heart anymore.” Sam said with disappointment.
“I do so have a heart.” Dean snapped back.
“Do you, Dean? Because I haven’t seen it in a long time, not since…” Sam stopped himself and took his eyes away from Dean and brought them back up to his brother. “Do you remember what you told me on that job in Blackwater Ridge?”
“Wendigo, right?”
“Yes, but do you remember what you told me?” Sam persisted.
“Not remotely.”
“You told me that it was them who would make it all worth it, people like her.”
“She’s not a person, Sam.”
“She’s not? So you look at her, and you tell me that you’re gonna waste her right here. Or you can tell me that you’re willing to walk away right now when she needs us.” Sam said with utter conviction in his voice. He paused for a moment to catch his breath. “What happened to you Dean? Was it what you did? Is it the fact that it doesn’t matter what you do because there’s no way you can atone for what you did? Or is it the fact that you just don’t care anymore because you had fun doing the pain enflicting instead of the saving?”
“Sammy—” Dean began.
“That’s why I wonder if you still have a heart. You told me that this life was all about saving people and helping them and that was what dad wanted us to do. This isn’t the Dean I used to know, what happened to him, man?”
“He went to hell.” Dean answered, barely audible.
“So are you telling me that you don’t care about saving people anymore? They’re all just jobs? And you don’t give a damn what happens to Melinda?” Sam took a step forward so his face was only a few inches from Dean’s now. “Come on Dean, don’t mess with me, because I know you’re attached already. You fight with her so much because she’s just like you, and that scares you doesn’t it? Why don’t you just go tell her that we’re leaving? You can tell her that we won’t bother ourselves with her anymore because that’s what you want. You can just let her do this alone like she has been.”
“No, I’m not.” Dean said firmly. “You’re right Sammy, she needs us…and I think I just might need her too.”
“Then go talk to her, Dean.”
Dean turned away from Sam and began his walk to the door. “She’s a pistol, isn’t she Sammy?”
“Yeah, she’s pretty hot too.” Sam insisted.
“Melinda’s cute.” Dean said subtly.
“Just cute?”
Dean got to the door and before opening it he turned to look at Sam. “Okay, maybe she’s really hot….thanks Sam, for what you said…it really put things in perspective.”
Sam flashed a half-smile at his brother before Dean opened the door and walked out of the hotel room.
The sun was beginning to peak up and through the horizon now over the trees. There was a wide expanse of endless trees in front of the hotel. The Impala was glistening in the morning light, parked in front of their room. Melinda was standing in front of the hotel room window, leaning forward against the railing, staring out into the morning. The glow of the morning was lighting up her face and Dean took a moment to look at Melinda in silence before closing the door behind himself and walking over to the railing. He stopped next to her and leaned against the railing in the same fashion.
“You know, I—” Dean began and then bit his lip, trying to think of the right thing to say. “I had no right to say what I said.”
“It’s no big deal Dean, seriously.” Melinda replied calmly.
“No, it is a big deal. There’s things about me that you do know either.” Dean admitted. “Sammy and I have both had our fair share of deaths, that’s part of the life we lead, dodging the bullet and coming back one more time.”
“You’ve been to hell too…haven’t you?” Ever so slightly, Melinda lifted her eyes to Dean’s and stared into them, almost as if to study them. “I can see it in your eyes Dean, I know what that place does to you. You don’t come back the same person.”
“You’ve got that right…” Dean paused for a moment, he was being cautious about his words because he wasn’t sure that he wanted to tell her everything. Especially the things he had done in hell…he didn’t want to make her thoughts of him impure, but why would that matter anyways because Melinda wasn’t really anyone important in his life? Dean wasn’t sure…why did he have to think twice to make the right impression for himself with this girl? If that was the case, he had already tainted her thoughts. “I—uh, haven’t really talked about this with anyone, just Sammy, but only ‘cause he’s my brother.”
“If you don’t want to talk about it, I understand, and if you don’t want to listen either, that’s fine too.” Melinda’s tried to form a broken smile, but there was no avail.
“No, no, it’s fine. I think you need to hear this…and I think it’s time I talk about it instead of being macho all the time.” Dean insisted.
“Well, I think it’s better to talk about it, even if it’s with someone that is inconsequential, because otherwise it’ll kill you.”
“Who said you were inconsequential?” Dean asked, wondering where the question had even come from himself.
“I did…but I guess I’m just saying that because I’m
inconsequential to you, I’m no Sammy.”
“I’m not so sure that’s true anymore. You’re here with us aren’t you?”
“I am, but why would you care Dean?”
“I do, Melinda…” Dean said sincerely. “I really do. I understand what it is like to be in your position. To feel like you’re—”
“Meant for something more but it’s only led to something less.”
“Yes. And you’re right, hell changed me, I’m not sure I will ever be the same person again.”
“But somehow you will always be Dean?”
“Yeah, but I just wish I could prove that to Sam.” Said Dean.
“Just give it time. In the end, we are who we are, no matter how much we appear to have changed.” Melinda stated with incite.
“I hope that’s true.” Dean admitted.
“It is, and you’re so lucky you’ve got Sam by your side. Someone to actually share this life with. Can you imagine how lonely it would be without him?”
“I can…it hurts to think about. And that’s exactly what I did to Sam, I left him here all alone.” Dean was no longer looking at Melinda and he was now staring out into the morning. “You see, Sam was going to die…and I made a deal with a demon to save my brother’s life. I got one year to live with Sammy before hell got it’s clutches on me.”
“Appearances really are deceiving…at least your death was worth something. You sacrificed yourself for your brother. When I die this last time, I want my death to mean something…and I guess I will get my wish because it will mean everything.”
“It’s really nothing special, I was just being a good older brother.”
“By sacrificing your life for him?” Melinda said.
“To tell you the truth, I was tired of this life and the consequences that come with it.” Dean admitted, he looked back at Melinda again. “I mean, I really do understand Melinda. We’re in the same sinking boat here.”
“I get that now Dean, I appreciate you being so honest with me.”
“Uh…my pleasure.” Dean said awkwardly and paused for a moment. “How did you manage to get out of the pitt anyways?”
“I really have no idea. One moment I was being tortured by Alastair, and the next I was ripped right out.”
“Wait, Alastair himself, torturted you?” Dean sounded a bit shocked since he knew Alastair as the deal-maker and more like one of hell’s managers.
“Yeah, why?”
“Nothing.” Dean shook it off but the question still lingered in his mind. “So, what ripped you out?”
“If I knew I would tell you. But I do have this--” Melinda reached over to her shoulder, closest to Dean and pulled the shirt down over her arm to reveal the horrid, pink scars in the shape of a hand.
Dean looked down at her marks to realize that they were the sames one that he himself had been branded with when he was ripped from the depths of hell.
Melinda released her shirt and let it go back to its original position.
“I have the same marks, it was Castiel who ripped us out.” Dean revealed.
“Are you serious?” Melinda questioned.
“He didn’t tell you?”
“Obviously not, I only met him hours ago. It makes sense though. The dude won’t let me die because I’m too important….special isn’t everything it’s stocked up to be.”
“If you don’t like hell then why would you want to die?...Again?” Dean asked her.
“Isn’t it apparent, Dean? I’m screwed…I’m so screwed that it’s not even funny.”
“Can’t go to heaven because they don’t want you there…” Dean tried to empathsize.
“I’m a suicide case, so I’m predestined for hell…” Melinda added.
“Don’t wanna go to hell because it sucks so bad…” Dean continued on.
“If I die, then the world is fucked…no second chances.”
“And life…well that’s a whole other story.”
Melinda finally gave Dean a genuine smile, realizing that he actually could understand her; he might be the only person on this earth who even could.
Dean returned the smile to Melinda, thinking the same thing that she was.
“Hey, Dean?” Melinda broke the silence.
“Yeah, Melinda?” Dean replied.
“It’s good to know that I’m not alone in this.”
“Don’t worry, I’ll be here.” Dean reluctantly moved his hand over to Melinda’s on the railing and placed it on top of hers.
Melinda looked down at the comforting hand atop of hers then back up to Dean’s eyes.
Dean pulled his hand away questioning his actions. It felt weird to Dean because this was the first girl he had jumped all over because of her looks. Somehow, Dean actually felt compelled to this girl before him because she understood things that no one else could.
“Anyways…you wanna grab Sammy and go for breakfast?” Dean awkwardly asked.
Melinda was not phased by Dean’s sudden changed. She didn’t let it get to her, besides, it didn’t mean anything…did it?
“Sure, Dean.” Melinda turned and walked past Dean to the hotel room door.
Dean smiled brightly to himself, looking out at the morning sun greeting him for a new day. Maybe the end of the world would bring a whole new beginning…